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waves of energy
I am tired, physically tired, and I don’t concentrate well when I am tired.

That’s not such a big deal when all I am talking about is blogging. When I am working in the ER it is a bit more of a problem. There have been days where I was surprised I managed not to kill anyone make any mistakes.

My poor baby waiting for doctor

My little 3 year old has been coughing for days and started running a high fever today. The last two nights have been spent listening to her cough all night and going to her countless times during the night to comfort her.

Last night my hubby even got kicked out of bed and slept in my daughter’s bed while she crawled in with me and slept coughed all over me all night. Hubby says he is too old to sleep in a bunk bed anymore, even if it is the bottom bunk.

So I have been sitting her for a long time staring at the computer screen and willing myself to write my blog for today. Not because I think the world is going to come to an end if I don’t write for one day. But rather because I have committed to myself that I want to write everyday.

I usually spend a long time writing my posts and when I don’t I am not as happy with my work. I have so many half written posts and so many ideas in my head. And like Paula who wrote today in her blog post Mojo? What Mojo?, my thoughts have all seem to have disappeared as well.

So as I was beating myself up and deciding what to write, I patted myself on the back and said: “Susie, it’s ok if every once in a while you do not have energy. Give yourself a break”. Not that that concept is something new to me. I have learned to do that really well in regards to housework, errands and all kinds of other stuff. (I am sure my husband is nodding his head passionately at that comment. I am thinking he is tired of washing dishes and living in a pigsty mess.)

But until today, I have not let myself do that with my blogging. Maybe I am worried that if I will let my blogging slide if I don’t continue to live up to the standards I have set for myself. I don’t know.

So I hope my giving myself a break and not writing something too deep today is okay with all of you who read my blog. But truly it really is okay every once in a while to admit you are out of energy or inspiration. I am sure that it is nothing sleep (or an extra few hours in a day) won’t remedy. Hopefully, I will get some soon. Heck, it’s only 1 am…….

Have any of you ever just run out of steam?

Image:
WAVES OF ENERGY
Airton Kieling | Flickr Creative Commons

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I had a little laugh when Dawn from The Moiderer (as in talker not murderer) tagged me with the Kreativ blogger meme. I laughed because she tagged me in order to see how I would fit this meme into a “lesson”.

I guess she was either trying to make it really hard on me or she didn’t realize that this is the second time I have been tagged with this meme. I thought I did a good job the first time around, and I have been racking my brain for another 7 interesting facts about myself.

But like the title of today’s lesson, never turn down a challenge that is not harmful. So since this one is in good fun, my hubby helped me out and this is what we have come up with. Not quite as interesting as the first list but still…..

1. I can shape my tongue into a flower.

2. I have a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology and an Associate’s Degree in Nursing.

Nursing School Graduation

3. In 7th and 8th Grade I was on my school’s basketball team basketball. I was famous for my 2 handed over my head foul shots. (Not a pretty sight)
gutter ball

4. I have finished each of the Harry Potter Books in less than a day and I have reread each of them dozens (if not more) times.

5. When I’m upset at my kids, for some reason I end up yelling at them in Hebrew. Go figure because English is my mother tongue. I guess I want to make sure my kids understand me really well. I also find it hard to have a medical conversation in English. But that is understandable because most of my nursing career has been in Hebrew.

6. I have done rappelling down a 50 meter drop from the top of a cave. How embarrassing is it that fifty 11 and 12-year-old kids did it with less dramatics than I did? For my daughter’s Bat Mitzvah we took fifty of her friends on a field trip and rappelling. (Yes, we were insane to have voluntarily have done that!)

7. When I was 18 I smashed up my boyfriend’s black sports car while he was in the car with me. He saw the other car coming and tried to get me to stop the car but my reflexes were just not very fast. Then when I heard the police sirens coming I tried to run away and leave him there on his own. But guess what? He still proposed less than a year later and married me anyways. It does kind of explain though why unless he is unconscious he does not let me drive while he is in the car. (BTW-I have a picture of him and beloved car before the wreck, but am too tired to go searching for it now. Maybe I will add it later.)

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So now that I have proven myself up to the challenge, I now have to tag seven other bloggers. I think that is the hardest part.

The rules are as follows:

1.Copy the award to your blog.
2.Insert a link to the person who nominated you.
3.Share seven things about yourself that you haven’t told us before.
4.Nominate seven other bloggers for the award.
5.Link to their blogs.
6.Tell the nominees about their award

I tag: (all bloggers who are new to me)

*Amanda at I am a mommy
*Mommy Needs Coffee
*I Know I Need To Stop Talking
*Alice at Alice’s Adventures In Blogland
*Siany-Sian at Musings of the Siany Sian
*Miss McFarley at *McFarley Makes A Mess *
*JK at WEST OF THE PENNINES

Images:

GUTTER BALL
Peter Shanks | Flickr Creative Commons

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Enthusiasm Uncurbed

I racked my brains for quite a while to try to find the right title to convey what exactly I was referring to. I am not sure it is 100% what I wanted but it was the best I could come up with after working night shift and getting home bleary eyed in the morning.

So in case the title wasn’t self evident, let me explain. If you are enthusiastic about a pursuit and you keep at it, the people close to you are going to inevitably be drawn in by your enthusiasm.

I have been noticing for a few weeks that when something unusual or funny happens around the house or to our family, my kids have started blurting out, I bet you are going to blog about that. A few times, the thought to blog about a certain topic hadn’t even entered my mind until someone in my family bought it up as potential blog fodder.

This past Sabbath we were 18 people staying over by us. (Actually 18 plus one gorgeous baby.)  Over the course of the day my blogging was of course discussed and once again I got suggestions about potential blog topics. I thought it was so nice how people were enthusiatic for me about something that was inportant to me.

So what I say is this. Share your enthusiasm for your joys and hobbies with those you love. You never know which of them will be your next source of inspiration.

Have you ever had people join in when you are enthusiastic?
Image:

ENTHUSIASM UNCURBED

© David M. Goehring | Flickr Creative Commons

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A list

Like everyone else, I too am sometimes guilty of worrying about what others think. I too sometimes tailor my actions to something I think might be more acceptable to others.

I do have to say though that over the years I have learned to assign less importance to what others might say or feel and to do what I feel and think is right for me. I am not saying I ignore others or their requests or insights into my personality. (Though sometimes I do.) I am not saying I don’t like or crave approval and validation by others. I am human so of course I do. All I am saying is that when push comes to shove, in order for me and the people around me to be happy, I need to be true to myself and listen to my heart.

Recently I have been rather surprised by how so many talented writers/bloggers have been having an issue with what they write, whether their content is appealing to readers and their issues with success. Just the other day Josie wrote about her insecurities at Sleep is for the Weak. As usual, her doubting herself really had me stumped because she is an amazing writer and photographer and she has inspired many people with her writing workshop and prompts.

Mark Twain said “Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one is listening. Love like you’ve never been hurt and live like it’s heaven on Earth.”

3 of 8 Girl dances (jumps) at water's edge on Morro Strand State Beach
I have heard some other takes on that phrase that include:
“Live every day like its your last.”
“Love like you’ve never been hurt.”
“Work like you don’t need the money.”
“Live like heaven on earth.”
“Live like you give a damn.”

Josie, for you and for another good friend of mine who is an amazing writer and who also struggles with the whole issue of success I have now coined the phrase “Write like no one is reading.” Actually I wrote it a few days ago when I responded to your blog post, but still….

What I am saying to you and to all the other talented people out there who are doubting their way is this:

Write for yourself.
Be true to yourself.
Write what brings you joy and makes you happy.

Whether you are a singer, a dancer, a worker, a writer or anything else in life, do those things that make you happy. But most importantly do them for yourself. Not for anyone else. Not for anyone’s approval. For yourself.

When you are true to yourself and worry about doing what is correct for your heart and soul, you will blossom in all aspects of your life. You will achieve confidence you never had. You will truly enjoy the things that are important to you and make you happy.

Sure you may go through ups and downs. That is life. All I am saying is to have the strength not to lose yourself along the way.

And for those times when things are tough I have found this picture and excerpt from the photographer Todd.

“It isn’t how you’ve succeeded in life that matters, it’s how you’ve held yourself when things have fallen apart.”

I believe that if we are true to ourselves and live like no one is listening, watching or reading we will achieve everything we hope to and we won’t have too many moments where we feel things have fallen apart. Just be true to yourself. And Dance, Sing, Write and fulfill your dreams whatever they may be.

Images:

A LIST
© Miss Izs | Flickr Creative Commons

GIRL DANCES AT WATER’S EDGE
© Mike Baird | Flickr Creative Commons

WHAT MATTERS MOST
© Todd | Flickr Creative Commons

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I love being tagged with awards and memes by other bloggers. It gives you a chance to get to know other bloggers and for them to get to know you. It also at times gives you something to write about when you are struggling to find a light hearted topic, or sometimes any topic.

The way I write my blog, I have a theme. I try to blog about a lesson in life each day. Sometimes fitting memes into “a lesson” can be challenging.

I have done a tenth photo meme and I still have another one to do. I have done a 7 things you don’t know about me meme, and I have done the Happy 101 list of 10 things that make me happy twice. The first time I wrote about unexpected happiness and the second time I wrote about there being happiness in every day.

When I was tagged for the third time with the Happy 101 ten things that make you happy meme by Potential Mummy B at My Baby Adventure, I chuckled to myself. I wondered if I would be clever enough to come up with a new take and a new lesson on something I have done twice before.

I have risen to the challenge and I have decided to write about ten things I am happy I don’t have to do. How is that for creative?

So here is my list:

1. I have no more pampers/diapers to change. Sure I still have my little daughter’s cute little tushy to wipe, but no more smelly diapers.
Babies Stink.
(Photo courtesy of Miss O’Crazy)
(Unless of course you count the ones I change on adults in the ER. Hmmm, maybe I should qualify that and say I am happy to have no more baby diapers to change.)

2. I don’t have to find things to do with my free time to keep me from being bored. That’s because I have no free time. I have my family, my house, my job and now blogging. No, I definately do not have to find things to occupy my time.

3. I don’t have to iron with an iron that barely gets out the wrinkles. I have an amazing big humungous steam iron and when I iron it goes really fast. Unless of course I have two weeks worth of ironing piled up because I have been blogging…

4. I don’t have to work full time. Or I should say I don’t have to work full time in a paying job. I am thankful to be able to have the luxury of only working part time.

5. I don’t have to do all the housework on my own. My kids are big enough to help out and sometimes they even do a better job than me. My hubby is a great help as well.

6. I don’t have to fight my kids for computer time. Thanks to my amazing hubby, I finally have my own mac laptop. I am quite sure that he is regretting buying me one since I have been linked at the hip with it since I got it and definitely since I discovered blogging. mac-butterfly-3
(Photo courtesy of Spike)

7. I don’t have to think twice about picking up the phone and calling my sisters overseas. Or at least as far as cost I don’t. Them being 10 hours behind me can be a bit tricky if I don’t want to wake them in middle of the night or at the crack of dawn. I remember when the cost of these overseas phone calls were prohibitive and did cause you to think twice or at least keep your calls short.

8. I don’t have to go to parent/teachers meetings. Well I don’t know if it is true that I don’t have to but I don’t go because my husband goes instead of me because I really do not like going. So let’s just pretend that I don’t have to go.

9. I don’t HAVE to go to school. If I chose to go back to school to learn something it will be because I want to. I do feel bad for my kids sometimes when they are struggling with subjects that they really will never use.

10. It’s okay if I don’t have a number 10 for this list, because I can’t think of anything else. So I am happy that I don’t have to have a number 10 if I don’t want to.

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And now in blogging tradition I tag the following bloggers with the Happy 101 award and send them on their mission to find a list of ten things that make them happy. And if perchance they have done it before, they have creative license to change it around.

* Paula at Battling On
* Annette at Mammakerr
* Claire at The Life of a Twenty Something Mum
* Tara at Sticky Fingers
* Julia at What Will Julia Do Next
* The redhead at Deer Baby
* Snaffle’s Mummy at Snaffles Mummy
* Vicki at Vegemitevix (Because I would like to see how she manages to come up with another list when she only managed one on the list she just did. LOL-with friends like me who needs enemies?)

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Happy?
(Photo courtesy of Joe Shlabotnik)

Every day no matter how stressful or hard brings happiness with it. You just need to look out for it and learn to recognize it everyday things. You need to learn to let simple moments infuse the happiness into your day.

This is the second time I have been tagged with the Happy 101 Award. The award means that I have to make a list of ten things that make me happy. Last time, I was tagged for this meme by Heather at Notes from Lapland and I wrote a list of ten things that make me happy in general.

This time because I am not in the greatest of moods (don’t worry nothing important or life changing) in response to the tag by Entropy Girl I have decided to focus on finding 10 things that make me happy today right now. (Besides being tagged of course.)

So here is my list:

1. Hearing my husband’s voice when he called me on his way to work. His voice can generally make me smile.

2. Having a job. Even though like I have mentioned before I am not fully satisfied where I am, I am still happy and grateful to have a job and an income. (5 kids is not cheap!) Having a job is not something I take for granted in this time of recession.

3. The rain today.

Freesia in the Rain
(Photo courtesy of John Morgan)

I live in a country that is plagued by drought. So what if it rained right after my husband and youngest son worked so hard and cleaned all the windows in the house so thoroughly? Or right after my eldest son had the car washed? I do feel bad that my husband got caught in the rain when he took my youngest to the nursery, but still the rain is a blessing.

4. My health. Sure it may not be 100% perfect, but there is nothing like working with ill people to make you appreciate your health.

5. My writing.
WRITE
(Photo courtesy of Karin Dalziel)
The simple act of writing and blogging has given me a lot of joy. It has made me reach deeper into myself and it has taught me to persevere. I have only been blogging for a bit over a month, but have enjoyed it thoroughly and have learned a lot. Writing is something you can do anywhere, when you have a few minutes or a lapse at work like I did today.

6. Having my little girl call for me at 5:45 in the morning to wipe her little tushy on the toilet. Okay, so technically she was calling my husband, but that is also a cause for joy no? Better (for me that is) that she wants her daddy in the middle of the night.
So back to my daughter’s little tushy. I was already up getting ready for work (because otherwise that wake up call would have made my cranky not happy list). She was so cute and adorable. I am also happy she has been toilet trained since age 2. She has saved us a lot of money.

7. Classical or cool music cellphone ringtones. I love hearing an unexpected tune start playing from a co-worker or patient’s cellphone. The upbeat tempos just give an unexpected beat to your day and a momentary change of atmosphere.

8. Hospital Food. Yes, I am weird, but I love the food served at my hospital. From the time I get to work I wait patiently for lunch so I can eat. Or maybe it’s just the novelty of eating a meal I don’t have to cook.

9. My cellphone being quiet today. It’s nice every once in a while to have a quiet non ringing day.

10. Today’s morning shift being slow for the first few hours and only 8 hours long. Not 8 1/2 like evening shift or 9 hours like night shift. It was even slow enough that I was able to write all this at work.

So next time you are having a less than happy day, think hard and I am sure you will be able to think of at least 10 things that make you happy. If I was able to do that today, anyone can.

When have you been able to find happy in an ordinary day?

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I am passing this award on to:

*Nicola at Some Mothers Do Ave Em
*Ed at Little m Long a
*Josie at Sleep is for the Weak
*Dawn at The Moiderer
*Nickie at Typecast
*Trish at Mum’s Gone To.
*Jen at Autism, The King and I
*Mrs. Mad at The Mad House
*Karin at Cafe Bebe
*Sue at Smiffy’s Blog

And anyone who would like this award, I am awarding it to you as well. Please come and take it.

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I have always associated addiction with someone hooked on drugs, alcohol and even on cigarrettes. Now I find myself asking am I addicted?

addiction
(Photo courtesy of Alan Cleaver )

I don’t do drugs, have never even smoked and I don’t like alcohol. No way any normal person can call me an addict! Or maybe no way any one can call me normal…. But anyways, lately for some reason, people (like my family) keep telling me that I am addicted. I have no idea why. So that got me looking into the definition of addiction.

According to the Merriam-Webster online dictionary an addiction is:
1 : the quality or state of being addicted
2 : compulsive need for and use of a habit-forming substance (as heroin, nicotine, or alcohol) characterized by tolerance and by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal; broadly : persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful

————————————————–

Okay, so according to definition 1 the verb addict means:
1 : to devote or surrender (oneself) to something habitually or obsessively
2 : to cause addiction to a substance in (a person or animal)

Sadly, after closer examination of definition 1 of the verb addict, I must hang my hang in shame, stand in front of all of you and say: My name is Susie and I am an addict.

At this point of time my addiction is blogging. In the past I have been addicted to exercise. (I have not been moving much from the computer so no, that is not a problem right now.) I have also been addicted (many times) to food. I have even been addicted to cleaning. (Okay maybe not really, but I was addicted to having a clean house.) I am thinking that at this point my husband would probably be happy for me to return to my cleaning addiction and my exercise addiction.

So it seems that if you obsessively devote yourself to something, you are addicted to it. In this day and age I would hazard a guess that most people are addicted to something. Some addictions are harmful and life threatening. Others are less harmful.

I really do enjoy blogging. I also think I am still learning the ropes which is why it takes me so long to get my blogging done. Finding good pictures to go with the blog is also time consuming. Add to all that the fact that I am trying to be part of the “blogging community” out there. There are some amazing blogs and bloggers out there with such diverse points of view. I will even venture to say that a few of the people I have “met” through blogging are going to continue to be friends for a long time. That is what is so beautiful about the internet. You can be thousands of miles away from someone and still connect in a meaningful way. In many ways sometimes even deeper than friends in your “real” life because you can be more open and honest.

Why Aren't You Blogging?
(Photo courtesy of Mike Licht )

So what do you guys think about blogging? Is it an addiction? A habit that should be broken?

So what now? How do I still continue to do something I love and enjoy while not neglecting other important aspects of my life? If anyone has words of wisdom, it would be great to hear them.

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